Because of Him Ch 8

Because of Him Chapter 8
By: Dizappearingirl (2015)

Summary: It was his job. It was what he did. It was all he thought half-ghosts were allowed to do. But then he meets her and everything changes. His world expands. His memories begin to return. And he remembers. Remembers who he was, what happened to him, and who was responsible (AU)

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Chapter 8: A Long Day

Sam

“No…” the word echoed in the space between us and I shuddered. The halo of light around his body shrunk and darkened. It had always been a pearly white, soft but bright enough to cast a glow around his body. Now it was turning red like his eyes. “No,” he repeated in a growl.

I took a small step back, exhaling unsteadily. The cloud of warm air drifted between us for a few moments before fading away. Phantom still stood rigid and tense, his face hidden from my view, and I was at a loss for what to do. Should I run? I shuffled back a little further away. My attempts at bringing out his friendly, familiar self seemed fruitless, so now what? He wasn’t attacking me…yet. He was just standing there.

“No…” he said once more, but his tone had changed. I stopped my slow withdrawal as his aura brightened again. He sounded pained.

“No, no, no, no…” Phantom repeated in a mumble, hunching in on himself while his aura warped and twisted around him. White. Red. White. Red…

“Phantom…” I breathed.

“I don’t...” he moaned. “I can’t, but…”  White.

“Phantom,” I said in a slightly firmer tone.

“But I…” Red.

“Phantom!”

He jerked back, his head snapped up, and his hands fell away to reveal his face…and his eyes.

Green. They were green. I stared at them for a few more seconds to confirm that they weren’t going to change back, and then I closed my own and sighed in relief. My shoulders sagged and I took several deep breaths before looking back at him.

He was watching me, confusion seeping into his gaze. “Sam…? Wh-what happened? Why…why can I see your breath? It’s cold in here? Why’s it so cold?”

“You tell me,” I replied. “You were the one who decided to start winter early in here.”

He gave me a baffled look. “What? What do you mean?”

“Right now. You were trying to scare me away, making it cold and,” I waved a hand, the other still pressed against my chest, “and all the other stuff. Don’t you remember?” He slowly shook his head, his eyes wide.

“You don’t?” I raised an eyebrow.

“I…” Phantom looked around, his expression slowly growing anxious. “I don’t remember…I don’t remember you coming—it’s night? But it…it… I don’t—I don’t remember!” He wrapped his arms around his middle and stared at me, clearly frightened by this realization.

I shook my head and shrugged. It’s not like I knew either, but I could fill in some gaps at least. “I don’t know why you don’t remember, but…you weren’t really yourself. You were acting really weird. It was like you were…a different person. And your eyes…”

He touched his cheek with one hand. “My eyes?”

“They were red,” I explained. He seemed surprised and turned as if expecting to find a mirror to check for himself.

“But…but that’s not normal, right?” he asked.

“No,” I almost laughed at the question, though it really wasn’t that funny. “Definitely not.” Neither was the color change in the light around his body, though that had also, thankfully, returned to its normal hue.

Phantom stared off into space again, his eyebrows pulling together and mind obviously whirling. “Did I…did I do something to you? You said…you said I tried to scare you again. Did I do something? Did I…hurt you?” His eyes darted to my face and then down to the hand I cradled against me from when the cold around him had lashed out. “Your hand—did I hurt your hand?”

I hesitated to respond. The answer was obviously yes, but it was fine and I didn’t think even his red-eyed-self meant to do that. Not really.

“I did, didn’t I?” he continued and his expression turned appalled. “I hurt you! Why? Why would I do that? Why don’t I remember?!”

“Phantom, it’s fine,” I tried to interject, but he overrode me.

“I wouldn’t…I didn’t want to do that. Never wanted to do that…but I did.” His voice lowered, his eyes now on the floor, as if talking to himself now instead of me. “But I…I had to. I had to try to scare you. I was trying to. I wanted you to leave. I was going to…” He trailed off, horror over taking his features.

“Phantom?” I grabbed his shoulder and that quickly regained his focus. His eyes met mine. “I’m okay,” I assured him. “You just got really cold there for a moment and made my hand numb, but it’s fine.” I raised said hand and wiggled the fingers in front of him. “See?” It was true. They still felt a little tingly but otherwise were back to normal.  

He studied my hand for a few moments, then swallowed and nodded. “I’m sorry,” he said softly.

“That’s okay,” I gave him a brief smile.

“I’m sorry I tried to scare you,” he added, his eyes dropping to the floor again. “It’s my job, but I said it was okay for you to come, and then I did that… I did…” His shoulders shrugged under my hand and I could feel he was trembling slightly. A wave of sympathy rolled over me as I watched him try to control his obvious panicking. Despite whatever trepidation I still had, I needed to focus on him for a moment.

I ducked my head a bit so I could try to meet his eyes, but he determinedly avoided it. “I think something must have happened to you to make you do this,” I said instead. “Do you know what it could be?”

He shook his head, attention still on the ground. “I…I don’t know. I just felt like I really had to do my job. I had to make you go away and keep…” He raised his head, his gaze aimed in the direction of the back wall. He didn’t finish the thought but said instead, “I had to scare you.  So you wouldn’t come back.”

“Do you know why?”

“It’s my—“

“—Job,” I finished with a sigh. “I know, but can you think of any reason why you became this way now?”

He shook his head again and mumbled, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, Phantom. I just think we need to figure this out.”

His face turned toward me, his eyes meeting mine finally. He looked surprised. “You…you’ll help me?”

Instinctively, I snapped back. “Of course!”

I almost regretted the words, though I didn’t let that show. Because I knew what agreeing would mean. This wasn’t a flippant promise. What had just happened really had been creepy. It made me realized there was something happening at this warehouse that was much more sinister than just a random ghost haunting its walls. Something… dangerous. What could possibly turn a gentle spirit like Phantom into the chilling specter that he had been just minutes before? Something or someone had done this. Was I willing to get involved?

But despite my reservations, I couldn’t leave. I was Phantom’s friend and it was clear to me now that he really needed my help. I had to figure out what it was and, maybe, even find out how to stop it. I could do that. I would do whatever it took to help protect my new friend.

He continued to watch me with wide, green eyes. “Are you sure? I…I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to leave… I,” his gaze fell once more and guilt stole over his features, “hurt you and scared you…and I don’t know why. And I don’t know if I’ll do it again.”

“Then we’ll just have to figure out a way to stop it, huh?” I said, trying to sound confident. “You and me, Phantom, okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

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I stayed with Phantom for a short while longer but then I had to go home. I felt bad leaving him there by himself. I could tell he was spooked by the whole thing (who could blame him? So was I…). And what if he changed back to that other red-eyed-self while I was gone? But I had to be back by curfew to avoid my parents’ suspicions, and I was cutting it very close. I could tell they were already a little concerned with how often I had been away lately. I didn’t need them banning me from going out.

The next morning the sky was still spattered with clouds. I arrived at school a little early, my mind still wrapped up in the events from the night before. What had happened to Phantom? The question played itself over and over in my head like a broken record. I couldn’t come up with an answer; there were just too many holes that needed to be filled.

The first possibility was that it was some other side of Phantom that I had just never encountered before. I had only known him for a week; there was still plenty I didn’t know about him. But if this was normal then he wouldn’t have been so confused, right? He had been mortified by whatever had happened to him. Unless he was used to frequent bouts of missing time and he was just super embarrassed that I had found out, I was pretty sure I could rule this out as a normal occurrence. I guess I would need to ask him just to make sure....  

But, if that wasn’t the case, then something changed to make him act that way. Something changed in his environment. Well, obviously, I had come into the picture, but I wasn’t sure why I would set something off like that. And again, that was under the assumption that it was some natural part of Phantom that had come out. I really couldn’t wrap my brain around the idea that Phantom had a dark side; it was such a dramatic shift. Again, maybe I couldn’t rule it out completely, but I wasn’t going to go with that idea until I had some solid proof from him that what happened was normal. And that just didn’t fit.

So, besides that, it would be something that was done to him. Something or someone had…what? Given him something that changed him? Drugs? Some substance that warped his personality? Or…maybe it was something ghostly…? Ghosts had the ability to fly and phase through things. They made the room cold and could disappear. Who knew what other powers they possessed! Maybe some other ghost was doing something to him. I knew that more and more ghost sightings were happening. Maybe one of them did something. I paused. Powers they possessed…what about possession itself? Ghosts could overtake someone else, right? I’d heard stories about that. Maybe someone was… “possessing” him somehow?

Was that even possible? I had no idea. I knew the basics about ghosts (who in Amity Park didn’t?) but beyond that not much. And that was mostly centered on what they could do that humans could not, and what they do to humans when they cross paths. I hardly knew a thing about what ghosts could do to each other. And why would a ghost do that to Phantom anyway? What was the point? Besides, that didn’t really fit with what else I had found in the back of the warehouse.

I sighed and rubbed my forehead as a headache began to form. I needed more information. I needed to know what was going on in that building. I knew that Phantom had to protect it and I knew that there were other people that were there sometimes. I had seen the paperwork and blueprints on the desk in the back room. It made me think of spy movies or bank robberies. Of course, it could be something as simple as construction workers, but what builders needed a ghost to protect them? It had to be something shadier than that, right? So who were they then? Humans? Ghosts? What were they planning? Had they been the ones who had changed Phantom? And why?

The bell rang and interrupted my thoughts. I had walked to my locker, my body on automatic while I had been distracted, and I quickly switched out what I needed before hurrying off to class. I made it with barely any time to spare, dropping into my usual seat. As I pulled out my notebook I couldn’t help but sigh impatiently. I didn’t have any desire to think about essays, algebra, and biology. What I really wanted to do was to go right back to the warehouse right now and talk to Phantom some more. I needed to figure this out.

But that meant skipping school, which was not an option if I wanted to keep my parents oblivious to my frequent trips to the docks. A mysterious absence was an open invitation for some awkward questions that I definitely wanted to avoid. Instead I’d just have to be patient and wait for the end of the school day. My history teacher told us to open our textbooks to the chapter on imperialism, reminding us to pay attention and take detailed notes for the test we’d have in two weeks. I groaned internally. This was going to be a very long day.  

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I was right in my assessment and by lunch time I was so restless I could hardly sit still. My thoughts had run in circles throughout the morning, creating more questions and more theories, each a little wilder than the last. I was so preoccupied by it all that I didn’t realize Tucker had spoken to me until he kicked my leg with his foot under our lunch table.

“Hey, Earth to Sam,” he called. My head shot up from where it had been resting on my hands and I looked at him dazedly.

“What?”

He gave me a wry smile. “So what was it this time?” he asked.

“What was what?”

“Normally you get all brooding like this when you have an argument with your parents or with someone from the popular gang. So, what was it?”

I kicked him back lightly and he smirked. Then I shook my head. “No, it’s not either of those. I’m just…” I considered him for a moment and then continued, “worried about Phantom.”

At first confusion crossed his face and then it melded into understanding. “Your ghost,” he said.

“Yeah,” I cupped my chin with one hand, resting my elbow on the table, and sighed. “I think there’s something…going on there, something wrong.”

I could see the reluctant look on Tucker’s face, even as he asked, “Why?”

I felt a flicker of surprise. Wow, was he really asking? But what would I tell him? That I went to the warehouse only to find a very creepy version of Phantom threatening to make me leave? Oh and let’s not forget that his eyes had changed to red. Yeah, that would go over very well with my friend who wanted me to have nothing to do with ghosts because he said they were dangerous (which, under consideration, he may be right but I sure wasn’t going to admit that!) But I really liked the idea of discussing my thoughts with Tucker. I needed a sounding board.

“Well,” I began, “Phantom was afraid of me being there sometimes because he said he had to keep everyone away. He won’t really tell me why but I kinda got the impression it was because there was someone else there—not while I was there,” I quickly interjected, “but during the day. It was like he has to, um, protect them…?” I blinked. I never really put that together before, though now it seemed incredibly obvious. Phantom said he protected the warehouse, but my being there wasn’t that bad until I went in the back with those papers. He wasn’t protecting the building so much as the people and their stuff. More questions bloomed in my head at that realization, but I filed it all away for later reflection.

“And at first that wasn’t really a problem, but last night…” an image of the red-eyed Phantom staring at me with that deadpan expression flashed across my mind. “Last night he just seemed really different. I just get the feeling that he’s being…forced to do it. I don’t know. I’m just worried for him.”

Tucker had stared soberly at his food while I had talked. He still remained quiet for a few seconds after I finished and then inquired, “So if he’s trying to keep people away, why do you keep going back?”

“Because we’re friends,” I replied instantly. “He’s okay with me going there—if I go in the evening.”

He gave me an annoyed look.

“What?” I asked.

“If he’s trying to keep people away,” he repeated carefully, “do you think it’s safe for you to be there?” His eyes moved away. “You said you think there might be something wrong. Maybe you should just not go back.”

I frowned. “Like I said, he’s my friend, Tuck. If he’s in trouble or something then I should try and help him, right?”

“Not if it gets you in trouble,” he said.

“So the next time you get cornered by Dash and his gang, you want me to just let you take it?” I countered.

“That’s not the same thing.”

“Yeah it is,” I argued. “If my friend needs my help, I’m going to give it.”

“He’s a ghost!” Tucker spat out the last word.

“So?” I snapped back. “So what?”

“So…” He took a deep breath and let it go in a gust. “Never mind.”

“No,” I leaned forward. “Tell me. Why are you so against ghosts? What have they ever done to you?”

He looked up at me sharply, anger burning in his eyes. His hand on the table clenched into a fist. “They…” his voice shook as it trailed off. Abruptly, he stood up and stepped away from the table.

“Tucker…”

His eyes slid away from mine. “They killed my best friend,” he said in a strained tone. He then spun around and walked away.

I jumped to my feet. “What?” I gasped. He continued moving, not glancing back, and I watched his yellow shirt weave through the crowded room and leave through the double doors. Was he serious?! But I thought that was just one of the rumors… I took a step towards the doors, wanting to go after him, but then I paused. What would I say? I dropped back into my seat. What could I possibly say to that?

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Phantom

“You and me, Phantom…. I’m not going anywhere.”

Sam’s words were the only reason I wasn’t in a full panic. But that didn’t mean I was okay. My hands were still shaking, my nerves on edge. I sat on one of the rafters, my legs pulled up to my chest, facing east. Sam had to leave at the usual time and that had meant hours of darkness alone. I just wanted the sun to rise. I just needed some light.

In the dark all I could think about was the last two days. At first I couldn’t remember anything, it was a blank. One second I had been with him, the next Sam was holding her hand and telling me that my eyes were red. I had been so confused. But bit by bit it was coming back to me.

It came in flashes, blurry and out of order. Him reminding me of the importance of my job…. Following beside Sam invisibly, scratching my nails into a nearby crate…. Watching the warehouse, determined to make sure everyone stayed away…. Him saying just how lucky I was to be with them because no one else would want me. No one wanted a ghost…. Sam telling me that I wasn’t like this…. Sam with her back against a crate, watching me with fearful eyes.

I buried my head in my hands. I didn’t know why this had happened—what had happened. It didn’t seem strange at the time. I just felt so focused, so determined, so confident…It wasn’t a feeling I had a lot of the time. Part of me had liked it. But I also felt…cold. I never felt cold while as a ghost, but during the last two days I had. I felt cold and distant, like I had been seeing the world through the wrong end of a telescope. And all I could think was, I was a ghost. Nothing mattered to me. Nothing but my job.

It was a strange feeling, a scary one. I hated it.

I hated it because Sam was right, it wasn’t me. I also hated it because Sam was wrong too, it was me. My job was important and I did have to scare people away. I had felt different but what I was thinking hadn’t been. My main objective was always to protect them. I had just been willing to go a lot farther to do that.

I shuddered at the memory; Sam backing away into the beam of her flashlight, her purple eyes wide with fear. I had scared her. I had done it before in small ways but this time I had done it intentionally. I had wanted to scare her, to terrify her. I wanted to and had tried in every way I knew to do it. I still couldn’t believe I hadn’t succeeded. She had been afraid, yes. She had admitted that herself. But she didn’t leave. She stayed, she talked to me, and she promised to come back. I still couldn’t believe it, but I had to. It was my lifeline.

I lifted my head a little so I could see out the windows. The sky was lightening, black turning to gray. Next it would turn pink. I exhaled shakily and then rested my head on my knees. The night was over and Sam would be back this evening. I just had to make it through the day, just had to wait until she came. All I had to do was my job. I could do that. I sat in silence as the seconds ticked by slowly.

It was going to be a very long day.

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The hours had passed slowly as I guarded the warehouse. They had come in their usual manner; the woman alone with a cup of coffee in hand, the two men walking in together silently, and him. He glanced up at my place where I sat in the rafters as he entered. He didn’t say a word as he travelled to the back and joined the rest in their secret rooms.

Mid-morning the woman left and about twenty minutes later the Big Man followed. I stayed as far away from all of them as possible, keeping to the rafters. I didn’t want to interact with them at all; I just wanted to be left alone until night came. I did have to come down at one point for food, which the woman left on a crate as she returned in the early afternoon. As soon as I was finished, though, I returned to my perch above.

About an hour later, I was struggling to stay awake. I wasn’t sure how much I had slept while I was…during the last two days. I think I had at one point. But last night’s events coupled with the lack of sleep before it left me feeling completely drained. I stood up, one hand on a metal beam that cut diagonally above my head, and tried to shake off the sleepiness.

I was just about to jump off and fly around when the Angry One came out and told me to go back and sleep. I almost gave him a grateful smile as I floated down near him, but I kept my face neutral. I had a feeling he would be very upset if I did that. Instead I walked past him silently and headed for the room in the back where the couch was. I collapsed onto it, white rings flashing to life and swinging over my body as I lay there. Without the subtle buzz of energy that accompanied my ghost half, my exhaustion seemed to double and I was soon unconscious.

“Let me remind you of who you are.”

I was in darkness. My eyes were open but I couldn’t see anything. I turned around, my head swiveling back and forth, but no matter where I looked it was dark. It was like I was blind.

“You are a ghost.” The voice came from nowhere and everywhere.  “And you are human. It’s an unnatural combination.”

“Unnatural…impossible…wrong.”

I could see in the distance a pinpoint of light. My eyes focused in on it and I took a step in its direction.

“People fear what they can’t explain. People fear the impossible.”

The speck of light grew. It wasn’t white as I supposed, but red. A small red light.

“People don’t want what they fear. They may gawk at it, pay to look at it, but want it? Accept it? Ha! No one wants something unnatural.”

The light continued to grow until it was bigger than me. It was reaching now, stretching across the ground, the sky, reaching for me. I stumbled back.

“But I need you, Halfa. I need you to do your job. You must keep everyone away. Keep us hidden in the shadows until I have back what is mine. You must protect us. You must do what I say. You must obey me.”

The light was all around me, like I was encircled in it. Its intensity increased, blinding me. I threw up my arms, squeezing my eyes shut against the glare.

“Obey me.”

My arms and eyes couldn’t block the light and all I could see was red. Bright burning red. Except it wasn’t hot, it was cold. A cold so deep that it burned.

“Obey me,” the voice echoed.

I crumpled to the ground, unable to stand against the light or the cold. It was everywhere, all around me. Inside of me. I couldn’t see, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t breathe!

“OBEY ME.”

I jolted upright, my heart racing and chest heaving. My eyes darted back and forth, taking in the dirty walls, the card table, and the fridge. I stared at them blankly until my mind caught up and I realized where I was. I sagged against the side of the couch, still trying to catch my breath. What…what was that?!

Voices in the hall interrupted my thoughts and I automatically focused on the words.

“Where are you going?” said the Angry One.

“On a date. Food, a show, possibly a night at a hotel…what can I say? I love my job,” I could just see the smile on the Ice Woman’s face.

“Of course, I’m sure you are excited for your evening too,” she continued. “What is it you are doing again?” There was a moment of silence and then she laughed. “Oh yes, the sewers again. Well, have fun!”

The click of heels crossed the hall and then there was the creak of the door opening into the warehouse. He cursed under his breath before saying, “Come on.” Two sets of footsteps headed in the opposite direction of hers, further into the back.

I sat up and looked towards the windows behind me. From the angle of the light peeking through the closed blinds I could tell it was late-afternoon. I couldn’t have been asleep for more than three hours. Rubbing my eyes, I wondered if I should just go back to sleep. My body certainly wanted me to, but… I closed my eyes and flashes of the red light crossed my vision. I could almost hear the voice from my dream. His voice.

“Unnatural…impossible….”

I didn’t know if I wanted to go back to sleep. What if I dreamt about that again? Or what about my other dreams? It seemed like lately all of my dreams had been...disturbing, or at the very least confusing. The one with the hallways and the shadows had scared me, but the one with the woman asking me if I was sleepy? I didn’t know what to think of that one…

And there had been others, snatches here and there of things I was almost positive I had never seen. Images of people who I could only assume were figments of my imagination. I had pushed them away and let them fade from my memory. They weren’t important. Though they had always made me curious…

The door opened and the Big Man poked his head in the room. “Time to watch,” he told me. I nodded and returned to my post in warehouse.